#4

Hi All

Its jan 24 and I started my 4th treatment today, I had my rituxan today and it takes forever to get it , I started at 8:50am and I was done at 5pm. They take all the precaution with me so I don't have allergic reaction. but makes for a long day, I take lots to keep me busy but the main thing is Trevor is by my side the whole time. makes it easy. He doesn't leave me out of his sight. I will always treasure what he does for me, he doesn't say much but his actions speak louder then words.

its weird that I'm on my 4th cycle, I'm going to have a CT scan in the next few weeks to see how the chemo is working, if all is well I'll do two more and then I'll be done. I'm more nervous now then I was in the beginning.

So I'm taking my steroids again and went to bed to early because here I am, awake again in the middle of the night. I woke up at 3 determined I was going back to sleep but its 4:45, and I'm still awake. lol.

But overall I'm doing fine, its hard because I didn't loose my hair and didn't loose weight, because I think people think for you to be sick with cancer you must have those two things. well I didn't, so most times ppl think your doing great by the way you look, they don't see whats going on inside, I don't want to come across wrong I'm glad people tell me I look great, but what do you say back, yes I do but I feel like crap inside or do you want to worry them, sometimes I worry more about hurting them.

I have 3 more days of treatment, I get two chemo's on those days but the good thing its not long days, 2-2.5 hours, not bad eh. lol.

I'll write more in a few days to see how this treatment is going this time.

hugs to all and remember take care of yourself and fight for your body. if you think there is something wrong fight for the results. you have this body only once.